Chicken Sh*t

When the civilized Cartesian rebels known as Puritans, (aka: immigrants) risked their lives to escape religious and political persecution in Europe, they knew they would face many dangers. They threw caution to the wind and crossed the ocean in rickety little slave ships, devoid of toilets, saying "Who careth how bad it smells!"

They gave up everything, from porridge to potatoes, to forge a new life in the wilderness of the America's. They were willing to risk their lives for Freedom, and multi colored Indian Corn.

This is our legacy, or heritage, and our proud history (that is if you skip the Indian part, and the slavery thing) But outside of those minor details, we can all stand tall when we salute the flag.

Yes indeed we are a strong nation and a brave people! There's no doubt about that.

So we set to work, killing off all the Bison,



Ridding the forests of Bear. (Yes, folks, once upon a time, there were forests 'round here.)



When they were gone, we turned our sights of Wolf, Cougar, Eagle, Hawk and Owl.




The resulting overpopulation of Deer was not a problem, cuz we gots a whole bunch of folks who likes ta shoot dem! (They don't bite back.)

Animals are here for us to do with as we will. We breed, butcher, hunt, skin, harvest, eat, own, break, train, torture, pen, rope, brand, crop, harness, race, hunt, package, whip em and wear em, whenever and wherever we want.

When it comes to the things of nature, we have convinced ourselves that the world is our plate of pancakes, and we re going to flip it, trip it, and drip it any way we darn well please,

and that ain't no flap, jack.


Of course, The States just weren't big enough fer all the killin we was prone to, so we came up with new and better ways to exploit the land, up north in Alaska.




But even that did not quench our thirst for destruction, so when there were no wild things left, we turned on the dog.



Man's best friend.

Cuz they is SCARY critters.

And we want to be "Safe."

As a nation, we are shaking in our shoes over all sort of fears and terrors these days. (Me thinks that brave stock we came from, has been watered down a teensy weensie bit.)

Now we are afraid of our food animals.

Look out for the Mad Cows!



Heck, we are even afraid of chickens.



Avian flu.

"Quick, KILL all the Chickens!"

Chicken genocide.
HenOcide!



I wonder what would our Brave Founding Fathers think of all this yeller bellied sniveling?

I imagine they would think it fitting that we all die from infectious chicken Sh*t.

And maybe we should.