Sunday, July 02, 2006

Lets Put a Woman in the White House

Andy Rooney wrote a funny piece in which he asks, "Every time I think about it - which isn't very often - I think how wrong it is that we've never had a woman president of the United States. How did that happen? There has never been one American woman smart enough to be president? There isn’t a single woman alive as capable as George W. Bush? "

Andy makes a good point. IS there a woman in The United States as capable as Dubya? At this point, I am so ready for some diversity, I would vote for Edith Bunker!

Edith might be one donut shy of a dozen, but this "dingbat" was always the voice of reason, in the midst of partisan chaos. I can just picture Archie and The Meathead agruing over the war in Iraq:

Mike: We've got to get out of Iraq.

Archie: That's just like you commie liberals! A bunch of Cut and Run Chickens! Don't you realize if we don't fight the war over there, dem towel head terrorists is gonna bring it over here!

Mike: With what? They don'tt have any WMD's

Archie: Dey flew a plane into the world trade center!

Edith: Ohhhhh No Archie. That was Ol-Sammy-Been-layn. He ain't from Iraq, Archie. Sad-man-Who-Sane is the guy who gots his picture taken in his underwear. He's from a whole different country. You've got em mixed up, on account of they both have funny soundin names. The Sad-Man don't wear a towel Archie.

Archie: Dat don't matter now Edith, we're in there, and we has a duty as Americuns to stick it out until dem Iraquis becomes democrats, just like us.

Mike: I didn't know you were a democrat Archie!

Archie: That aint what I ment at all you Meathead! I'm talkin about Freedom and the Good Ol American Way!

Edith: I don't think you can force people to be free at gunpoint Archie. Maybe we should just let them decide about that for themselves.

(End of episode. Fade out.)

So, why is it that we have never had a woman president? There are more women voters than men in the U.S, so it stands to reason that if the women stood together we would have more women in public office. But in spite of the numbers, and the outstanding efforts of
The League of Women Voters, we have yet to put a Woman in the White House. Women apparently dont vote for women in this country.

Are we just trying to be polite, by not voting for ourselves, or are we so brainwashed by the Cosmo covers and Action Hero - Damsel in distress archtype that we can not find one woman capable of taking on this job? It's only four years folks. It's not like we are risking a lifetime appointment.

As far as that goes, take a look at our supreme court judges.

Outside of the one token female, and African American, we've got us a black robe wearin gang of powerful old white guys. Not that I have anything against old white guys (OWG's), but the fact is, they've been hogging the buffet for way too long.

They are The Hells Angels of The Hill. A rip roarin bunch of rowdy red neck rebs, more powerful and dangerous than any gang on the street. But do we care? Do we pay attention? Do we use our votes to infuse our govenment with pluralistic diversity? No! We vote in OWG's, through the GOP because we are afraid of WMD's, the NAACP, NOW, and the ACLU, not to mention GLB's (Gays, Lesbians and Bi-Sexuals.)

If we the People are the ones doing the voting, why is it that our leaders are not reflective of the cultural diversity in this country? The president of The Great Melting Pot should look more like Tiger W than George W.

Before we go stormin around the globe, waving the flag and forcing democracy on other cultures, I suggest we take some time to practice the art at home. When we get to a point where our elected officials actually reflect our population demographics, we might discover other countries will open up to the idea without the diplomatic incentive of quaking under our big American WID's. (Weapons of Infidelic Destruction.)

Remember the old Coke Commercial?

What happened to that sense of diversity in America? Where have all the Hippies gone? (Long time pa-a-ssing) Is The United States doomed to be run by GOP OWG's who out spend, out shout, and out spin each other for the holy grail of Power? Are we so stupid and apathetic that we buy into this farce? Do candidates really have to suck up to people like Jerry Fallwell in order to get votes?

Enough already. Let's put a woman in The White House, A Native American on The Supreme Court, and fill the House and Senate with Asian Americans, Mexican Americans, Islamic Americans, Jewish Americans, and a few Suburban Pagan housewives too!

I think the country is ready for a girl like Sam to speak for The State, especially since she has a masculine sounding name. The problem of course, is Daren.

We might be ready for a Mrs. President, but can we handle a first husband?

All the other foreign leaders would make fun of him at parties. It would demoralize and demasculinize every OWG in America! It would destroy the sanctity of marriage! The OWG's would all become hopeless viagra addicts who act out in desperate cries for attention!

Then again, they already are. So wadda ya say ladies, shall we put a woman in the White House? And dont wriggle out of it with the party/platform excuse. We all know darned good and well that any candidate who makes it to the show is centerist, and we have a system of checks and balances to keep even the wild ones in line.

Get Progressive! Let's smash the highest level of the great glass ceiling! Do it for your mother, Do it for your daughter, Do it for yourself, or just do it for me.

The White House Project Mission

The White House Project, is a national, nonpartisan, non-for-profit organization, created to advance women’s leadership in government, from local elections to the U.S. presidency.

"By filling the leadership pipeline with a richly diverse, critical mass of women, we make American institutions, businesses and government truly representative. Through multi-platform programs, The White House Project creates a culture where America’s most valuable untapped resource—women—can succeed in all realms.

To advance this mission, The White House Project strives to support women and the issues that allow women to lead in their own lives and in the world. When women leaders bring their voices, vision and leadership to the table alongside men, the debate is more robust and the policy is more inclusive and sustainable. By supporting women and the values that allow women to succeed—the full range of health options, security platforms that utilize all our resources, economic stability for all—we work to create an equitable culture."

To find out more visitThe White House Project and cast a vote for REAL democracy.


fineartist said...

RIGHT ON! I love the site, and had never heard of the organization before...Where the heck have I been, and would someone help me remove my head from my-------hat?

It blew my mind to see some of the information that they had blinking on the screen. Like, women have only been able to vote for around 86 years, while our democracy is 230 years old. I know, I knew this but it just seems so much more absurd when you think of it in numerical terms and see it flashing across a screen. It's like, hey, yeah that's right, man--shakes head.

Kelley Bell said...

I know! The stats are a real wake up call.

-Hey, thanks for dropping by. Its always so nice to see you. Coffee Dear?


Val said...

(Another) great post, Kelley.
It's too bad that Jean Stapleton & Elizabeth Montgomery are both dead, however! (but yeah, I get the parody...)
How 'bout -- Maria Shriver?
It's a damn shame Ann Richards has retired (dx'd w/esophageal cancer)...

Rain said...

brilliant All in the Family lines!!!

Kelley Bell said...

Hi Val,

How ya doin darlin? Im glad to have you drop in. If this werre real life, I would take you to meet my friend the Magical miracle Maggie, and have her treat you to one of her famous hot stone massages and aroma therapy treatments.
-Shes the best in the biz.

Heres hoping your days are filled with laughter and sunshine.

In the meantime, i will contimplate a Maria Shriver post. Thanx!

ME Strauss said...

Gosh. you really are the best thinker and researcher on the planet. . .

I think there might be one more reason why there's not a woman in the White House. Women bosses and women teachers that we've had.

Kelley Bell said...


I can't tell if you are being sincere or sarcastic, (or maybe a bit of both) but It's good to have you drop in.

Care for some cookies and herbal tea?

(Oh, and you too Rain...Here, Have two. It's my grandmothers oatmeal recipe. They are to die for! and healthy too.)